Trusting Others

We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy. — Walter Anderson

I know I’ve talked about trust before, but I was provoked to think about it some more. Seems I don’t have very good radar when it comes to who I can trust. Matter of fact, my trust has been misplaced more than once I must say. So, how does one work on developing that sense that helps you determine if someone is trustworthy? I used to think that I could just avoid putting my trust in anyone. I had been burned in the past and thought that I would just avoid relationships altogether. That didn’t solve much as far as trust is concerned. I avoided one kind of relationship, but still wound up in a relationship that was not in my best interest.
Then I thought perhaps I should just be an open book and think the best of everyone. Not a good approach either. I found inevitably that I would be disappointed. This probably applies to relationships and other aspects of life (like work). So why don’t I get the red flags or some kind of warning sign that I am being too vulnerable? I’m sure it has something to do with self-esteem as well. I need to think more of myself and that I deserve better than how I have been treated. I need to find the middle of the road when it comes to trusting others. How do I question other’s motivation without offending? My nature is to help others (I am a nurse after all) but I need to be cautious in my dealings. People aren’t always what they seem to be…

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3 responses to “Trusting Others

  1. It is VERY hard not to help everyone!! But I am getting a LOT better!

  2. This has been a frequent experience in my life. I have found some solace in Henri Nouwen’s notion that when you open your arms to welcome someone into your close life they may hug you back and they may summon help (triangulations) to have your hands held down and nailed, at the wrist, to a cross

  3. Others are more adroit than I am at employing the “swine test” i.e. sniffing out whether those you are about to expose your hard won pearls to can treat them with respect and dignity. Remember “don’t throw your pearls before swine?”

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